lucas reed - our birth story

Well, I was fully expecting to be sitting here writing a 40 week pregnancy update. Instead, my punctual little man came into the world 13 minutes into his due date and I get to share our beautiful birth story! Without further delay, here goes.

Back up to week 39. I updated that I had my membranes stripped at my appointment. I lost the plug on Saturday morning and started having bloody show, along with some contractions. They were not very painful or frequent. During the day, they were about 8-10 minutes apart, but would disappear at night. Sunday through Tuesday I still had the bloody mucous and contractions were 6-8 minutes apart during the day, but would still go away at night. On Wednesday, nothing. A random contraction here or there, but a whole lot of nothing. I literally spent all day on the phone, texting, or chatting with people about how I feel like I was going to go all the way until 42 weeks and have to be induced and how I was getting discouraged. I was thankful that I hadn't gone into labor Monday or Tuesday, as we spent those nights in the ER with Conner running an insanely high fever. Had I gone into labor on one of those nights, Chris would have had to stay home to take care of him. 

Wednesday afternoon I met up with someone to buy some Flip covers and inserts. On the way home, Chris asked that I pick up Taco Bell. Ate that greasy mess for lunch and then decided to have a frozen pizza for dinner. I had just finished picking up the kitchen and Chris was finishing up some counseling statements for work, since he had to sign back in from pre-deployment leave the next day. Sirius was being the weird dog he is and doing the doggy head tilt whenever I would talk to him. It had my laughing so hard. That's when I laughed a little too hard and felt and heard a pop in my pelvic area. Then I yelled at him for making me laugh so hard that I peed myself. Literally minutes after the pop, I had a pretty intense contraction. This was different from the ones I had been having the previous week,  because it went into my back and sent waves of pain down my legs. This was around 7:30 pm. A few minutes later, same thing. I told Chris that I just had 4 contractions 3-4 minutes apart and that they hurt. Now keep in mind, I had been in early labor and dealing with contractions since Saturday. So he knew I was serious when I said it hurt. 

At 8pm I sent my doula, Angela, a text saying "I don't want to get too excited, but I just had a few contractions 4 minutes apart and they were pretty intense. I'll keep you updated." A few minutes later, I called her and was like "So, I know I just sent that text, but they are almost back to back now and hurt pretty bad. I think this is real." She said she was on her way to my house, since I had planned to labor at home for as long as possible. We started getting a bag ready for Conner to take to the Maranto's, who so kindly offered to watch him even with him being slightly sick still. I got the remainder of our stuff together and was having a hard time breathing through some of the contractions. I went back into the living room and told Chris that I was kind of afraid at how quickly these contractions came on and about the popping feeling earlier and I thought we needed to skip laboring at home and head in. I had tested GBS+ and knew I needed 2 doses of antibiotics during labor to help prevent passing it to Lucas during delivery. I text Angela back and asked her to just meet us up at the hospital.

We got Conner dropped off and made our way to Winn. The contractions were terrible in the car and I had felt a few small gushes. At this point, I was unsure if it was my peeing on myself or my water. I have terrible bladder control during pregnancy. No shame lol. Once we met Angela, we headed up to 4th floor L&D. I told them I was pretty sure I was in labor, but not so sure if my water had broken or not. They got me hooked up to the monitors in the triage area and sure enough my contractions were 2-3 minutes apart. The doctor checked my cervix and said I was almost completely effaced and at a 3, almost 4 dilation. It was my water that I felt, and my body made sure to tell me so right before he checked my cervix. Poor guy got a gush on him haha. Around 9:30pm I was admitted to L&D and moved to the delivery room. Unfortunately, I got a nurse right away who we had once already had the displeasure of dealing with. She instantly put up a fight with Angela and sent her out of the room. Mind you, this is all while I am having back to back contractions and she's trying to get an IV in my arm. She blew 3 of my veins. I was crying so hard because she kept being rude to Angela when she was only doing what she was there for, making sure I got the birth experience I wanted. She told me that if Angela kept challenging her, they would send her home. The thing was that she wasn't challenging her, she was just pointing out that my birth plan said this and that nurse was completely ignoring a majority of what was in it. I think she got fed up, because she didn't come back in my room again.

New nurse was MUCH nicer. She got the IV in and started my first round of antibiotics.I was in so much pain being on my back, so Chris and Angela got me onto my hands and knees and tried counter pressure. It helped a little, but it was still bad in my back. Lucas was sunny side up and we were trying to get him to flip over. We tried with me in a side-lying position, but that hurt just as bad as being on my back. The new nurse, Katie, asked if I'd like to use the birthing ball or the shower. Chris, Angela and I all were kind of shocked, because mean nurse told us they had none of it available for me (even though when I brought my birth plan in 3 weeks prior, I was told it was available in all rooms). She was just a bitch, pardon my french. She also said I did not have to be continuously monitored since he was showing no signs of distress. I could go off the monitors for 40 minutes, back on for 20. Awesome! She left the block in, but released me from the IV, blood pressure cuff and monitors. So birthing ball it was. It helped a lot! Angela showed Chris how to do counter pressure and sacral massage. Such a relief, but I was hardly getting a break in between contractions. I started getting upset that I might cave from my birth plan. Around 11:30ish, it was so intense that I said I was going to get the epidural. Angela and Chris both reminded me that I didn't want it, but I was in such pain I asked again. Angela had Chris take me to the bathroom to empty my bladder. The catheter was one of the reasons I wanted to avoid the epidural. While trying to pee, I had back to back super intense contractions. I looked at Chris and said I was so upset with myself for asking, but I didn't think I could do it. My active labor with Conner was 17 hours long. I had only been there for 2 hours and contracting for 4 hours. How was I going to get through another possible 13 hours of back labor?! When we came out, I told the nurse that I wanted it. She asked if I was sure and I just started crying and said yes. She had to check me before she ordered it though. At 11:50ish I was at 5cm dilation. 

The nurse was hooking me back up to the monitors and before we could even get them back on I felt super intense pain in my pelvic area. I asked out loud, to no one in particular, "Why does it hurt so much now?!" She asked if I wanted to be checked again, even though she had just checked me 20 minutes ago, since they would have to check once more before the epidural could be put in. I said yes. She got ready to check, barely inserted her finger and said "He's right there. It's time to have your baby." WHAT?! Twenty minutes ago I was at a 5! Chris said "Amber, you did it! You don't need the epidural, you did it all on your own!" One of the other nurses went to see if the doctor could come in, but he was delivering another patient. He was the only doctor on the floor, so she came back in and told nurse Katie that she might have to do it. She asked me if I wanted to try to hold out for the doctor, but I didn't get time to answer. He was already on his way out and they could see him. She got on gloves, I pushed twice in 3 minutes and he was here at 12:13 am, delivered by my awesome nurse. All of us were kind of shocked. My labor started at 7:30 pm and ended at 12:13 am. Not even a full 5 hours. From 5 to complete in 20 minutes. My little guy was born sunny side up. That back labor was the most excruciating thing I have ever experienced. It was the most awful, yet the most wonderful pain I have ever felt in my life. I didn't feel a 'ring of fire' when he came out. To be honest, the worst part for me was the transition. Now that I know how fast it went, I know that I must have started the transition while I was on the toilet and had those bad contractions. 

Anyway, back to the birth. He came out and they instantly put him up on me, skin to skin. We did delayed cord clamping and waited until it stopped pulsating before it was clamped and cut. During that period, we got him to latch and breastfeed for a little while. He was allowed to stay skin to skin for an hour before they had to take him off to do vitals. I delivered the placenta and it was instantly handed over to Angela. She is not only super doula, but also super encapsulator and photographer. She captured so much of my birth experience. As soon as they took him off me, I asked to go to the bathroom. I got up and walked into the bathroom and peed. I was super shocked at how little pain I was in. I just had a super fast, intense and unexpected birth and yet I was up walking around in zero pain. The only pain I had was where I had to get a few stitches. He came out so quickly that I tore a little. No swelling at all. When all was said and done, I'm so glad things went the way they did. I really did NOT want that epidural and I fully believe that my little guy played a huge part in his timing. Think about it, the one day Conner starts to not have a fever, I go into labor. As soon as I ask for something outside of my birth plan, he makes his entrance. He knew mommy wanted to have a very natural labor with no interventions, but only after I was allowed to get his big brother back up to par so Chris could be at the birth and Conner could come see us after. 

We got moved over to recovery around 1:30 am. Because I had not gotten my second dose of antibiotics for the GBS+, Lucas had to have his blood drawn and a mandatory stay in recovery for 48 hours to be sure it wasn't passed to him during delivery. We fully boarded in with him in our room and requested that they only come in for mandatory checks and not every hour. I was unable to sleep, being that I was on a baby high. Chris went to get Conner a few hours later to come meet his baby brother. That night, they went home and it was just me and Lucas. This is my first time breastfeeding, so we had some ups and downs that first day and night. He's a super feeder once he is latched, though! I've already discovered some of the more.. un-fun.. things about breastfeeding, like cracked nipples and blisters, but I love the bond. Night number two was a bit rough, too. Chris and Conner stayed the second night. Lucas would latch but then get frustrated and unlatch. He did this for over 6 hours. My boobs were so sore and I was in tears, but we had to give him a few mL of formula to raise his sugar level back up. The next feeding we went back to the breast and he latched very well. The hospital also gave my a hand pump so that if this happened at home, I could pump and give it to him in a bottle, since I refused the formula. The nurse I had overnights was very compassionate and could see how much it hurt me to have to give in and let him have even a few mL. Not because I am super against formula, just because I felt like a failure. I'm so happy we haven't had any issues since. Well, my boobs DO still hurt lol. 

We are home now and I couldn't be more happy. Our family is so complete. I might be outnumbered by males, but everything just feels so right. Let me just say, I don't think I would have had the birthing experience I did without the help of Angela and Chris. They were so awesome. From making me laugh, to countering the contractions with massage, to just letting me be when they knew I needed to be. I could not have had better support people bringing positive vibes in that room with me. And nurse Katie. She's a rock star for delivering him. Here's one of my favorite pictures of the night, courtesy of Angela Roper, super doula/encapsulator/photographer!

Happy Birthday, Lucas Reed.
September 20, 2012
12:13AM

7lbs 11.5oz

19" long

Conner certainly loves his little brother.

pregnancy week 39

Oh my. Has it really already been 39 weeks? Yes, yes it has. Just had our 39 week appointment this afternoon and got some news. Here's our weekly update! Keep in mind, I hold nothing back. There is probably information in here that will gross some people out. I didn't make you read it! Lol

-Lucas is head down and in -3 position.

-I am currently 2cm dilated, 50% effaced.

-Had my membranes stripped again. Insta-bloody show.

-Heartbeat is 148, much lower than it has been, but still good.

-Uterus is measuring at 40 weeks.

The midwife says as long as my body is ready for labor, that the stripping usually helps it along within the next 48 hours. She actually went as far as to give me information for the doctor on call tonight. She has much higher hopes than I do lol. We have another appointment scheduled for next week, the day after my due date. If it gets to that point, we will try one more membrane sweep and set up an induction, just in case. I'm still holding out for my natural birth, but I've come to terms with the fact that it might not happen without a little assistance. 

Chris, Conner and I are so excited that time is coming near. We can't wait to snuggle this little guy and show him how much we love him. Conner has taken such an interest in him the past few days. He has always been interested, but he rarely messes with my belly. The past few days he's been rubbing it and talking to him. He's so good with other babies. I just know he's going to be an awesome big brother. 

pregnancy week 38

We have some progress! I do have a couple little updates, but nothing too significant.

-Heartbeat is still strong and good

-Little man seems to be head down

-1 cm dilated, 50% effaced

-Swelling is occurring big time in my hands and feet

-BH still going on, but nothing consistent or frequent 

Lucas seems pretty comfortable right where he is. I am pleased to hear that a little dilation has occurred. That's right where I was with Conner when I went to be induced at 40 weeks. We are trying to avoid any induction this time and hoping to go into labor naturally on my own. I'm not pushing it too hard, since I don't want to force my body into labor before it's ready. Walking, cleaning the house, bouncing on the birthing ball and a pedicure are about as far as I'm willing to push right now. We still have 2 more weeks before his 'estimated' birthday. I do hope he decides to come by then, just so Chris can get some time with him. 

I don't remember if I mentioned it in the 37 week update, but we found a doula, Angela, who will be attending our big day. I'm so glad that I spotted her post in a cloth diaper group we are both in. I've gotten so much information from her and I don't feel as anxious as when I'm alone with the doctors. I've come to realize that doctors seriously intimidate me. I want to have the most natural birth experience I can in a hospital setting, and with the support of Chris and Angela, I'm certain I can do it without feeling guilted or bullied into anything by the nurses and doctors. I have my birth plan written and revised to exactly how I want it. I haven't shared it because I don't want to feel like a failure if something doesn't turn out how I want it to be. I will share it for sure, in it's entirety, whenever I post my birth story. 

hospital bags, take two.

Being that this is baby #2, I already know that there are some things I packed the first time that were not necessary, and some things that I did not pack that were very much needed. With little man's estimated birthday fast approaching, I keep getting the itch to pack our bags, just in case. He seems pretty comfy in there, so it'll probably be at least a few more weeks before we will need them, but can't hurt to be prepared! 

Again, keep in mind, that everyone has a different labor and delivery. The lists I'm going to be presenting are totally based on what I personally find necessary or useless. I'll give my reasoning, but I'm sure there is someone out there who could counter absolutely everything I say. In the end, it's what is best for you. :)

Mommy's Bag DO's:

-Clothing. Uh, duh. Unless you are in a nudist colony or are doing a home birth, chances are they will make you get dressed before you leave. As much as we all want to snap back to regular size, and some people really do, most of us will still look pregnant when it's time to vacate the premises. Bring comfy clothes. My bag specifically has a few dresses for ease, some sweatpants, nursing bra (without underwire), socks and a few t-shirts.

-Underwear. Again, unless underwear isn't your thing, these are needed. I suggest old ones, as postpartum bleeding can be a big mess. They'll likely get ruined. Or you could opt for some depends. I'm totally serious. You might think it's a ridiculous suggestion, but the local birthing center actually suggests adding these to your birth bag. That way you don't have to bring the next mentioned items:

-Pads. Yep. Unless you go the depends route, you need some gigantic, oversized pads. Overnights work best, from my experience. Most hospitals will give you a few pairs of mesh undies and a handful of pads and that's it. So this one, for me at least, is very important. 

-Hygiene kit. I don't know about you, but my favorite thing after giving birth (aside from snuggling my newborn) was getting that first shower. The hospital will give you some generic little samples to use. I hate those. I went and bought a small, clear travel bag and travel size shampoo, conditioner, body wash, deodorant, toothpaste, mouthwash, face wash, hand sanitizer and bath sponge. Then I added in some hair ties, a razor, chapstick, hand mirror, brush and a ziploc bag (to but the wet sponge in) from home. Some people also like to bring their makeup. That really isn't a big deal for me. I rarely wear it, and that'll be the last thing on my mind once I have a newborn in my arms. 

-Snacks. Now listen, doctors and nurses will try to deter you from eating and offer you ice chips. With my first, I listened to them. I was in active labor for 17 hours and hadn't eaten since the night before. By the time it was all said and done, I spent nearly 36 hours without any food. It was terrible and I had zero strength. The point of them not letting you eat is pretty much so you don't throw up. I'm going to be honest here, I can still throw up with just water and ice in me. And it's much more rancid than if I had food in my stomach, since it's mainly acid. This time I am bringing granola bars, crackers, juice and hard candy. I'll still gratefully accept the ice chips, because I love ice.

-Electronics. Cell phone, camera, chargers. Pretty self-explanatory here. I'll need the phone to keep our sitter updated and get updates about Conner. Plus, it's kind of helpful to be able to call family after. Camera to take lots of pictures and document my labor, the delivery and the sweet baby once he enters the world. Chargers for both, because I'll likely show up with them half dead.

-List of numbers. You know, that list of people you need to inform of the grand entrance. Parents, In-laws, grandparents, etc. 

-Birth plan. I already brought mine in for them to make a copy of, but I have two more copies. One that my husband will keep on hand and one for my doula. 

-Boppy. I plan to nurse, and this will help me keep baby up when my arms are about to fall off from trying. 

-Nipple cream. Sometimes hospitals will provide some for your use, but in the case they don't, this will be a lifesaver if you are nursing.

Mommy's Bag DON'Ts:

-Books or journal. Seriously. I brought these to my first with full intentions as using them as a distraction method. I found quickly that having contractions every 45 seconds doesn't really make for a good reading or writing atmosphere. Again, this is just me. Some people might find it comforting.

-Music. Again, just me. I found it oddly annoying and I just wanted the room to be quiet so I could concentrate.

-Breast pads/pump. As much as you want to leak (if you plan to nurse), chances are that won't happen while you are in the hospital, since it takes your milk a few days to come in. For the pump, hospitals provide them for your use if needed. And again, your milk will most likely not come in fully until you have gone home. No point in packing the extra bulk.

Now that we've discussed mommy's bag, let's move on to baby's. As stated several times before, this is specifically based on what I personally feel is or isn't necessary. 

Baby's Bag DO's:

-Clothes. A couple onesies will do for the hospital stay. Mittens so they don't scratch their face. Socks. Socks also work well as mittens. Sometimes better. I also have a special 'coming home' outfit for the day we get to leave. It includes a onesie, pants and a hat. Honestly, the hospital provides a hat, receiving blanket and shirt anyway. Your baby burrito doesn't need too much for the stay.

-Nail clippers. Some people say not to cut baby's nails, but Conner came out with some serious nails and I didn't have any. I resorted to biting them off for him, but I really wished I had brought my baby clippers.

-Burp cloths. Newborns spit up. You'll need at least one to wipe them off in the car on the way home.

-Wipes. The hospital will likely provide you with some of these, but a small travel case is helpful for diaper changes on the way home. Not going to lie, I use these for everything though.

-Baby book. Most hospitals do their footprints on a keepsake certificate. If you bring your book, they usually don't mind putting them in there for you as well. Saves you some time and mess when you get home. It's also a good idea to bring this so you can record the stats of the birth and baby.

-Carseat. This is a no-brainer. You won't be allowed to leave without one properly installed in your car.

Baby's Bag DON'Ts:

-Too many clothes. As previously mentioned, you (as long as baby and you are stable) will only be there for a few days. You don't need to bring their entire wardrobe. 

-Toys. Seriously, they are newborns. The sleep, poop and eat. They have no interest in toys yet. 

-Bottles. If you are breastfeeding, that is self-explanatory. If you are formula feeding, they won't let you use your own bottles anyway. Don't waste time and space for them.

-Diapers. Unless you are cloth diapering from the beginning, don't pack these. They give you a package while you are there. 

Some other things you may/may not find helpful to pack are 'big sibling' items. We want our toddler to be as involved as possible in every aspect of the new baby to attempt to avoid jealousy issues. After all, he has just spent 3 years as an only child with our undivided attention and now he will have to share it. I have a gift that from his baby brother, which is a book. He loves books. He also has a t-shirt that matches the baby's coming home outfit. Your support person will most likely need snacks as well. Unless they plan to make a run during the labor or recovery period. A pillow and blanket for your support person, since the ones at the hospital are usually limited to the bed being used by mommy. I used a backpack to put my items in and the diaper bag to put the baby's in. Now they are sitting with the carseat in the nursery waiting for that moment when we need to throw them in the car. Or for the moment I feel a need to put them in there, just in case. Haha.

conner's paint themed 3rd birthday

Usually when you ask a (soon to be) three year old what they want to do for their birthday party, you get an array of answers. Not Conner. He seemed to be waiting for me to ask the question, and quickly told me he wanted a paint party. Alright, we can do that. 

At first I was just going to let kids paint. And then Pinterest happened. I was also very much enabled by my friend Jess, who would find ideas and pass them on to me. Between the two of us, we planned a pretty awesome party! We decided to have it a month early due to all the chaos that will be happening around his actual birthday. Once that was in place, everything came together nicely. 

Since I don't want to end up on hoarders, I've limited myself to keep one item per birthday to be reminded. This year it was a canvas that we had the kids put their handprints on. We had that set up on our goody bag table, which obviously held the goody bags and then the rainbow candy station. Above that was a nice 4 foot picture collage of Conner from birth until now in the shape of the number 3. A last minute thought was to make a 'photobooth'. I used cardstock to make a polaroid type frame which we hung from the ceiling. Added some colorful streamers behind in and made some mustaches and lips. There was a fruit loop necklace station. Who doesn't like edible necklaces?! Our counter was transformed into a 'food for starving artists' area. Included on the menu were hotdogs, pasta salad, candied bacon, paintbrush rice krispies, rainbow cake, funfetti cupcakes, sugar cookies, multi-colored hugs (juice) and "magic" color-changing ice cubes in sprite (made out of koolaid). The kitchen table turned into a finger painting station, complete with paint splatter framed paper and a colorful ceiling decoration of streamers and balloons. 

Overall a very successful party. A HUGE thank you to:

Jess: For being my Pinterest sidekick and finding some awesome ideas for me to use.

Chris and Tetro: For staying up until midnight to help me decorate.

Maranto's, Gamboa's, Hilt's, Felumero's and Snyder: For helping us celebrate and give Conner a day to remember.

And mostly, to Conner: For being the light of my life and making every day something special. <3